Earl

“Sharon, do you need to feed the animals?”

“Oh yeah, I forgot!” I run to my room, put on my working boots and grab my keys. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.” My mom nodded and I walked through the murky darkness to my beat up car.

The drive to Chloe’s was quick since she only lives across the highway from me. I parked my car in her driveway and pulled out my phone as I turned off the engine.  I only had 6% left, but I thought if I took care of them fast enough, my phone would survive and I’d still be able to use its flashlight instead of hauling around the huge metal one I had in my car.

So I got the house key and opened up the house, I fed and medicated the dog, Kennedy, leaving the food bowel outside before locking up the house again. Knowing my battery was barely going to make it, if that, I ran up the hill to the goat pen. I went into the feed house to get his food, and in the back of my of my mind I thought it was kind of weird that I didn’t hear him in his shelter.

Now Earl is notorious for being able to get out of his pen. Mom and I had an incident a few years ago that dealt with just that. It ended in a few bruises, a scratched car, and a pretty funny story. Earl was by no means a nice goat to anybody except Chloe’s dad. And he’s grown bigger and stronger over the years.

I go up to his shelter and pull out his food bucket and dump his feed in it. Still not hearing him, I got more suspicious and a weight began to grow in my stomach.

“Earl?”

I heard it behind me. Clip, clop, clop. Oh no… Lord, please no. I turned around and shined my flashlight. Earl stood in front of me on the hill, staring at me. “Hi, Earl.”

I opened my phone and texted Chloe.

Ummm

I kinda have a problem…

I pressed send and that was all my phone could take. Power off. Shutting down.

“No…” I whispered. But my phone screen still went black and my flashlight turned off.

So there I was, stuck at the dead of night with this evil goat in front of me. No light, no way to contact anyone, and mom wouldn’t be getting suspicious of my absence for another fifteen or thirty minutes. I needed to get to the house. I glanced past Earl at the house down the hill, deciding it was way too far to run. And it was locked up anyway. I didn’t have that kind of time. So I started inching past him, my feet quietly shuffling on the grass until I was between him and the woods. I was pretty close by now, and I thought maybe if I tried to be nice, he wouldn’t butt me. So I slowly reached out a hand and petted his forehead.

Bad idea.

Earl backs up and rears a little bit before walking towards me again. I back up as far as I can until branches stick me in the back. I was as cornered as a mouse with an evil cat. The goat stands mere inches from me as I desperately try to think of a plan. Admittedly I was on the verge of tears. I choked back a sob. Every once in a while Earl would come up to me and brush his horns against my legs like he was going to butt me and I just prayed harder. Instinctually, I stretched out my hands. This only made matters worse though since his horn got caught in the sleeve of my sweatshirt. We both knew we were stuck and Earl started to pull away. Tears were about to come and I wasn’t trying to hold back my sobs anymore. Earl kept pulling and I grabbed onto a tree branch just to keep me from being pulled to the ground. There was a moment when I thought “This is where I die.” We were stuck in a terrible game of tug of war and I was on the losing side. All I could think about was pulling away, until it started tearing. Caught up in my fear, my mind went blank and I couldn’t even remember what I was wearing. I mentally went through my closet and all my sweatshirts. Was it my green one? No. My white one? No. My woven one? Yes.

Anger is a great stimulant, and works better for me than adrenaline. “Aw heck no!” I planted my feet firmly on the ground and let go of the tree branch. I turned face forward towards this goat from hell, and with my free hand grabbed him by his horn. With all my might I pulled him towards me as he tried to pull away, but I was on the winning side now. I pulled my sleeve off his horn, and even though I was in the dark, I could tell it was ruined. There are always sacrifices in war. I quickly backed up to my place in the woods and Earl came at me more aggressively now. I back into the woods more. I only had one choice.

I backed into the woods more, thinking that if this goat could follow me in here I’m sunk. When I was far enough in, I get down on my hands and knees and start crawling through the trees towards the house. Branches pulled at my hair and I stopped every once in a while to see if I could spot Earl in the dark through the trees and make sure he couldn’t follow. At one point I stopped and looked back. I could hear him clopping and something else… is he… panting? I heard a bark.

“Kennedy!”

If I could get to Kennedy, I bet he could protect me from Earl and lead me to the house. I crawled out of the woods to find Kennedy. When I spotted them, Kennedy was nearby and Earl stood a few feet away, staring at the dog.

“Kennedy!” I called. He trotted over to me, and I was sure I was saved. My faith was restored and the Lord really did love me. I stood and tried to sneak to the house while the dog distracted the goat. Sadly, that’s not what Kennedy had in mind, and he bounded past me and down the hill. I turned around to see a faint outline of Earl walking towards me, and I scrambled back into the woods. Returning to my hands and feet as I struggled through the branches back on my trek to the house. At times the woods would thin out, which brought the imminent fear of being exposed, and I would crawl deeper.

When I finally decided I was close enough, I left the woods and carefully made my way to the house. I heard the clopping of Earl behind me though, and knew I didn’t have enough time to unlock the house and get in. So I made a mad dash for my car and hurled myself in, slamming the door behind me. Peace washed over me as I realized I was finally safe and still alive. I pulled off my sweatshirt and examined the sleeve. A terrible gaping hole stared back at me and threads lined it like teeth. I sighed and tossed it in the backseat. I pulled out my huge metal flashlight and turned it on. I scanned the outside of my car, feeling very much like the player in Slenderman. Except what I was facing was much scarier. When I found Earl, he was still slowly making his way down the hill. I still needed to get to a phone, so I left the safety of my car and made my way to the house, quickly getting the key and unlocking it. I slipped inside.

Find a phone. Find a phone. That part was easy. I called my house phone and no one picked up. Next I tried my mom’s cell and she answered on the fourth ring.

“Hello?”

“Hey, there’s been a problem.”

“I’m on my way.”

“Wait. Earl-“ Click. The line went dead. Whatever. She was gonna find out soon anyways. I decided to see where Earl was while I waited. I opened the door and stuck my head out, shining my flashlight. I heard the clopping on the porch and slammed the door shut.

Chloe’s house has the door towards a corner and a porch that wraps around to the other side of a house. It’s very beautiful and big, and you can see all of it from the low hanging window in the foyer. I turned on my flashlight and shined it through that window. I was met with two eyes that I imagine resemble the devil’s. A scream escaped my throat and I leapt behind the corner.

By the time mom came, I was sitting on the sink waiting for her. It had one of the only windows facing the driveway. I called her and she picked up.

“What do we do now?” I ask.

“Chloe said she’d call someone to come put Earl up. My phone’s about to die.”

“Okay.” I hung up. The more I waited, the more I realized this could make a pretty good story. I wanted to write everything down so I wouldn’t forget it. So while I waited for someone to come put up the devil goat, I got paper and a pencil I vaguely recognized. I think I let Chloe borrow it in class once, but I couldn’t remember. I sat down at the dining room table and started to scribble notes. A few minutes later I saw headlights through the window and then I heard something on the porch. I thought it was probably whoever came to put Earl up and I became very aware of the fact that I was not wearing a bra. The door opened and my mom walked in.

“Someone’s putting Earl up now.”

“Mom I have so much to tell you.”